Love in today’s Culture

Is love even possible these days? Have we allowed our culture to corrupt the word? This is a biased opinion based on things I have seen, and relationships I have experienced.

Why is it so complicated to just be happy? We allow our bosses to dictate our lives and our priorities so much so that some of us are more fearful of losing our jobs that can easily be replaced and where we are easily replaced, than worrying about losing the person or people we are trying to build our lives with. I was guilty of this myself, I lost watching my children grow up until they were in their teenage years. I lost a marriage because o brought work home with me and the only way I could compartmentalize it was to shut down. Now, I have changed but the person I yearn for hasn’t gotten there yet.

There are some who need multiple partners to feel happy, fun fact, this is called hoeing. Some can make this work, but it really isn’t healthy. There are some who got their “hoe” phase out and have been run through ( both men and women!) and now you can’t go to the store without hearing whispers and getting looks, all while they have nothing left to give to you.

There are avoidants and anxious attachments and so many more it’s hard to name. At certain ages, there isn’t much that can be new, unfortunately. Experienced for the first time together. But there is the possibility that you will find your one. You’re forever and a day, happily ever after or whatever else you’d like to call it. What’s painful though, is when it’s only one in the relationship who feels that way and is comfortable showing it.

We need to get back to prioritizing one another in our relationships. Yes, we still need to prioritize ourselves from time to time as well, this is where I fall short. The goal though is to show your partner, spouse, how important they are to you. This isn’t for new relationships, this isn’t for on-again-off against (unless you BOTH want it and continue to fight for it). This is those who have proven themselves to us, proven to their partner that they will always show up. Middle of the night, middle of the day, in the middle of a job or whatever the case. Show up for your person when they need you! Be consistent, and commit to them wholly and entirely. If you can’t they’re not your person, and if they can’t then sadly you’re not theirs.

Good luck to all of you. I wish the best for you and your partner and your family if applicable. If you’re there for them but they never show up for you, then don’t prolong the pain. Things won’t change, and someone else may be able to show you that you do matter. Love is challenging, it is work, it can be annoying and exhausting and stressful… but true love is magnificent. It is a warm donut early in the morning with a fresh cup of coffee. It’s removing your shoes after a long day at work. It’s rinsing off in a shower after killing it at the gym. True love is worth the pain because pain is always temporary, but true love will last a lifetime. I hope for you, it’s a long life.

I’d love to hear your stories. Share your failures, your lessons, and most importantly your success! I’m still blowing in the wind, waiting to see if this is mine. I can only hope. I am hopeful that I can come back and share mine with you. One way or the other, I will share the outcome, and the story behind it!